


Not Exactly the Worst Birthday Ever (by a longshot)

by leftennant



Series: Tasertricks Oneshot 'Verse [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Tasertricks - Fandom, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Smut, birthday fic, tasertricks - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-24
Updated: 2015-03-24
Packaged: 2018-03-19 10:46:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3607269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leftennant/pseuds/leftennant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy's birthday could not have gotten any worse, but can a certain God of Mischief fix everything?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Exactly the Worst Birthday Ever (by a longshot)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mischiefgoddesscomplex](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mischiefgoddesscomplex/gifts).



> Happy birthday, mischiefgoddesscomplex!!!!!!!!!!!! I wrote birthday sexytimes just for you!!!!! Hooray!!!!!
> 
>  
> 
> ********************************************************

It had been the single worst birthday of Darcy’s entire life. From start to finish, the entire day had been a complete mess. All she wanted to do was go home, take off her ruined coat, and have a good cry in the shower. 

The day hadn’t started out so bad. She’d woken up to find a giant stack of pancakes set at her place along with a silly, oversized birthday card from Thor and Jane. Breakfast had been the best part of the day, actually. Jane even put a candle in the middle of the pancakes, and the two of them sang some traditional Asgardian birthday ballad. It was weird, but good weird. 

Loki, of course, was nowhere to be found. Darcy wasn’t really surprised. Thor’s mostly rehabbed little brother didn’t exactly seem like the birthday pancake celebration type. The only time Darcy ever really interacted with the God of Mischief was when she stayed up late to watch something on TV. Loki would saunter out of his room, drop onto the far side of the couch, and sit quietly, eyes fixed on the screen until whatever she was watching had ended.

Up until last week, that is. The previous Wednesday, Darcy had been lounging on the couch binge-watching Arrested Development when Loki emerged from his lair. He walked over to his usual spot, finding it occupied by Darcy’s legs. She watched him out of her peripheral vision curiously. After a moment’s contemplation, Loki merely lifted her legs, sat down, and let them fall back down on his lap.

Darcy couldn’t believe it. A few seconds passed with her covertly glancing at him, but he had his eyes fixed on the tv like he normally did. It was like he didn’t even know she was there even though her bunny slippers were currently sitting on his thighs.

For some reason that bothered her. She wiggled the bunnies to get his attention. Loki ignored them so she wiggled them harder. This time he looked up, one eyebrow raised in question. Now that she had his attention, Darcy wasn’t sure what to say. Finally she settled for, “Um, hey,” accompanied with a small wave.

Loki cocked his head. “Ms. Lewis.”

And that was pretty much the end of the conversation. Darcy didn’t really watch much of that episode. She was too busy being aware of the demi-god a few feet away to concentrate properly. Finally it ended and he gently removed her legs before standing up and returning to his room. 

She thought it was an isolated incident, but the next night he was back again. This time he went to the kitchen first, and came back a few minutes later with a glass in each hand. He wordlessly handed one to Darcy, and then sat down beside her. 

Watching him carefully in case it was some sort of a trick, she took a sip. Iced tea. The God of Mischief had brought her iced tea. Darcy was so shocked she almost forgot to thank him. Loki acknowledged her with a nod and focused his attention on the Bluth family. That night marked the first time she ever heard him laugh. 

But not the last. 

For a full week this had been going on. Loki would come out, get them each something to drink, sit close enough to her that she could smell the spicy, woodsy scent of what she assumed was his cologne or aftershave, and enjoy Arrested Development with her. Darcy wasn’t sure what to make of it. In the entire time Loki had been back on Earth, he hadn’t sought out the company of anyone. Not even Thor, although that was sort of understandable. They still had some unresolved issues from what Jane had said.

Not that she was complaining. If Loki wanted to spend his evenings laughing at Michael and Lucille with her, that was fine with Darcy. He was easy on the eyes, and never hogged the popcorn. Which was more than she could say for her last boyfriend.

Anyway, late night TV with Loki was nice, but that seemed to be where their acquaintance ended. Darcy never saw him around the apartment during the day, and her birthday was no exception. She finished her pancakes, got ready for work, and went in with Thor and Jane. 

That was when her day took its first turn for the worse. She wasn’t there more than ten minutes when one of the zillion faceless agents that worked for S.H.I.E.L.D. opened a door straight into her chest. That wouldn’t have been so bad, except Darcy was carrying a carboard tray full of Starbucks at the time. Fortunately, she had her coat on so she didn’t get burned. Unfortunately, her coat was brand new, a little birthday gift to herself out of the bonus she’d been saving. 

Darcy stared in horror as the soft grey wool of her coat soaked up the excess spilled coffee. She mentally tallied the dry cleaning bill while the agent at fault apologized. After that, things seemed to spiral down rapidly. 

Her computer abruptly shut itself down while Darcy was in the middle of a complicated formula for Jane and she lost all her data. Whoever had filled the copier last got toner along the front edge of the machine, and Darcy leaned on it, leaving long blue stripes on her skirt. She’d bought a cupcake on her way to work, and when she went to get her lunch, it was gone. Finally, when she was on her way upstairs to a meeting, Darcy got her heel caught in the tiny space between the floor and the elevator, twisting her ankle hard enough that she had to blink back tears the whole ride up.

The meeting itself was horrible. She forgot her pen downstairs, the intern filling the water glasses knocked Darcy’s over onto her notes, and Cap had decided to pop his head in on the only day when she was wearing coffee, toner, half a glass of water, _and_ nursing a lame ankle. Darcy kind of wanted to die. Actually, she wanted to go home. Which was exactly what she did. Hey, it was her birthday. What were they going to do, fire her? Unlikely.

Since she’d left early, there was no nice temperature controlled S.H.I.E.L.D. suv to chauffeur her. Those were reserved for actual Avengers, and the main reason why Darcy rode to work with Jane and Thor. 

The five block walk home was horrifying on her hurt foot. By the time she got back to the apartment, Darcy was limping in pain. She hopped across the lobby on one foot, smacked the elevator button with her elbow, and practically collapsed inside. During the short ride up, she slid off her heels. The doors opened, and shoes in hand, Darcy hobbled down the hall and slid her key into the lock.

Once inside, she fell into the nearest kitchen chair, wincing as she massaged swollen ankle. She was just debating on getting on some ice for it, when Loki wandered into the room. His eyes fell on her immediately, and he stopped in his tracks. 

“Ms. Lewis,” he said, gaze narrowing. “Are you not usually at work at this time?”

“Darcy,” she corrected. “And yeah, but as bad as my day has been, I decided to quit while I was ahead and come home. What about you? I had no idea you came out in the daylight, Dracula.”

He ignored her little quip, focusing instead on the way she was still rubbing her ankle. “Are you injured?”

“It’s nothing,” Darcy said with a grimace. “Just the icing on the cake for the worst birthday ever.”

“Today is your birthday?” Loki asked, brows drawing together as he looked at her.

“Yup. It’s been awesome, too. As soon as I got into work I had coffee spilled on my new coat, my computer died in the middle of a project, costing me hours of work, I walked into a toner explosion in the copy room, some jerk stole my cupcake, I practically broke my ankle getting on the elevator, and just to ensure that my day was a total loss, an intern dumped water all over my notes in front of Fury and Cap.” She rattled off the incidents one by one as Loki quietly listened with an inscrutable expression.

“It sounds a veritable disaster,” he remarked.

“It was,” Darcy replied.

“Although I suppose in the grand scheme of things, it could have been worse.”

“Define worse,” she commented dryly.

“Well,” Loki said, crossing the room so he could kneel in front of her. “You were not, for instance, defeated in an attempt to subjugate Midgard by a large, green monster who used you as a rag doll.”

Darcy’s jaw dropped. “Did you just make a joke about Banner smashing Stark’s floor with your face?”

“Indeed.” He took her ankle in his hands, examining it gingerly. “I do possess a sense of humor.”

“Really?” she asked incredulously. “Where do you keep it?”

He stood up and went to the freezer, coming back with an icepack which he applied to her ankle. Darcy was still reeling. The God of Mischief was _kneeling_ at her feet. It was too weird.

“You are shaking,” Loki said.

“You’re holding a bag of ice on my leg,” Darcy responded. Yeah. It was definitely the ice, and not him that was making her tremble. Hah.

The whole situation was bizarre. She had no idea what to say next. Fortunately, Loki seemed to have that covered.

“I am attempting to reduce the swelling. It would be a pity to mar legs as lovely as these.” His thumb rubbed a small circle over the top of her foot, other fingers tight around her heel to hold it steady for the icepack.

She could feel him looking at her. Slowly, Darcy brought her eyes to his. Even kneeling, Loki was so tall that their heads were practically level as she sat before him. The heat she saw flashing in his sea-green eyes made her legs shake ever more. 

“Shall I wrap the ice in something?” he asked, gaze never leaving her face.

“It’s not the cold,” she blurted out. 

A small smile played over his lips. Not quite a smirk, but almost. “No? Then whatever is making you shake, sweet Darcy?”

“You seem way too smart for a question that stupid,” she replied.

Now he was definitely smirking. He dropped his gaze to where her foot was cupped in his hands and then let it rove up her body until it landed on her face once more. By the time it got there, Darcy’s lungs were stuttering from lack of air.

“Perhaps I just wish to hear you say it,” Loki told her. “Perhaps this has been a very long time in coming, and I have run out of patience waiting for you.”

Her eyes widened. Was he serious? Were all those late nights of virtual silence on the couch supposed _mean_ something? If the way Loki was currently curling his fingers against the back of her calf were anything to go by, they definitely did.

She took a deep breath, fortifying herself in case this was some sort of game. There was always the chance that he was toying with her. You never knew what to expect from the guy who was known for being a deity of tricks and lies.

“It’s because of you,” Darcy said quietly. “And I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tease me about that, Loki. My day has been bad enough.”

The icepack dropped to the floor with an muffled thunk, and the hand that had been holding it moved further up her leg. “Oh, I fully intend you tease you, Darcy. Just not in the way you mentioned.”

Oh God, he was serious. He was serious and this was happening. Darcy found herself turning into an absolute trainwreck of arousal and disbelief as he bent his head to kiss the tender flesh over her ankle. 

“Why now?” she asked. “Not that I mind, but I look terrible.”

She gestured at the blue streaks on her skirt, and huge coffee-colored stain on her coat. Loki was busy removing her other shoe, but he raised his head for a moment, eyeing the spots she’d indicated.

“That is a problem easily remedied.” His hand slid all the way up to her hip, taking the side zip of her skirt between his fingers and pulling down in one smooth movement. “Stand up, Darcy.”

Swallowing hard, she did as he asked, shrugging her coat off on the way. The moment she was on her feet, he gave a sharp tug on the hem of her skirt and it fell down to pool on the floor. Loki held onto her arm, helping her balance as she stepped out of it, and then he tossed the skirt across the room.

“Mmm, yes. This is much better,” he remarked, lightly tracing the lace edge of her panties. She started to unbutton her shirt, and Loki reached up to stop her. “Leave it.”

“Okay.” Darcy’s eyes darted around the room nervously. Someone could come home at any moment, and by someone she meant Thor. The last thing she wanted was for him to walk in on her getting busy with his brother on the kitchen table. They _ate_ there. It would make breakfast weird for weeks. “Would you like to take this to my room?” she asked.

“No,” Loki replied. “I would like to take it to mine.”

Before she could respond, he clasped her waist in his hands and hoisted her over his shoulder. Then he straightened up and began striding across the living room, heading for the hallway that led to the bedrooms. 

If Darcy was surprised before, she was stunned now. _His_ room? She’d never even seen inside it before. They reached the door, and Loki stepped inside with her, kicking it shut behind them. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting. Black wallpaper? Snakes everywhere? The Slytherin common room? Granted her view at the moment was completely upside-down, but his room was nothing like how she’d guessed. White walls, spartanly furnished, a bookshelf completely filled to bursting with books, and a writing desk with a S.H.I.E.L.D. issue computer were the only things in the room besides the bed.

The bed was a little more like Loki. The blanket and pillows were varying shades of green, and looked like he’d brought them with him from Asgard. They were ridiculously soft too, something she found out when he deposited her on top of them with a bounce.

The smirk was back as he stood at the foot of bed, stripping off his clothing. Leather and metal landing on the floor in his hurry to join her. 

“Can’t you do that with magic?” Darcy asked. She’d seen the video from Stuttgart where he went from a suit to armor in a matter of seconds, and was curious as why he wasn’t just doing that now.

Loki paused, fingers stilling on a buckle. “It will not frighten you?”

“What, you using magic?” She shook her head. “Nuhuh. At this point, if it gets you naked faster I’m all for it.”

Her answer was rewarded with one of his rare laughs. Seeing it in the daylight when her focus wasn’t on the television was seriously something. The corners of his eyes crinkled up, and she could see his tongue peeking out between his teeth. 

“You know, you’re really pretty when you laugh, Loki. You ought to let go and enjoy yourself more often,” Darcy said.

He planted a knee on the bed, swirls of greenish gold magic starting to coalesce over his body. His clothing melted away before her eyes, and he said, “I assure you, we will both be enjoying ourselves in a moment.”

She shivered again. “Awesome.”

Loki grabbed her uninjured ankle, pulling her down until he was leaning over her. “I hope you will not object, but I was raised with the adage, ‘ladies first’.”

“And people say chivalry is dead,” Darcy muttered, as his palms slid up the inside of her thighs.

Her words were met with a chuckle, and then she could feel his hot breath through the lace of her underwear. His lips came down, teeth scraping, and tongue stroking her over the fabric. 

“Oh my God,” she moaned, feeling the lace grow wet as his mouth continued to drive her wild. “That is so fucking hot.”

“I have barely begun, Mortal,” Loki said. The vibrations from his words skimmed over her ready flesh, causing her hips to buck up helplessly.

He hooked his finger in the edge of her underwear, drawing them over slightly. His lips began trailing down the tiny amount of slick skin he’d exposed, tongue caressing gently, but going no farther. Darcy shuddered, body undulating beneath him. 

“Please…” she begged.

Loki glanced up at her over the expanse of her body and just shook his head with a smile. The finger stretched her panties over further, and he bent his head to his task again. 

She gasped as his tongue flicked over her clit, setting off what felt like fizzling sparks in her abdomen. “Fuck, Loki… Please!”

“You are so lovely when you beg for me,” he murmured, tongue slipping over her once more. “But you will have to go at my pace if you want release. I want to watch you come, Darcy. I want to feel your slick, pink flesh grow tight around my fingers.”

“Jesus fucking Christ. Who are you and what did you do with my TV buddy?” Her hips were rolling rhythmically now, trying desperately to gain more contact.

The fabric moved over another inch, exposing her completely to him. His tongue moved in a lazy swipe through her folds, finishing with a gentle suck of the sensitive nub at the top. “You would prefer to watch television right now?”

“No. Definitely not. More. More of that thing you just did.”

Loki repeated the action, and she found herself burying her fingers in his hair, urging him closer. Despite her obvious need, he refused to set up a rhythm, choosing to torture instead with seemingly random sucks and licks. Darcy was practically sobbing by the time he slid a finger into her aching core. He curled the finger, rubbing the calloused pad repeatedly against the front wall of her sex. She moaned breathily, fighting valiantly to keep from pulling his hair too hard.

Another finger joined the first. “Has your day improved?” he inquired between licks.

Darcy struggled to find her voice for a second. “It’s a little frustrating actually,” she finally managed to reply.

“Ah, well, we cannot have that,” Loki said, sounding amused, finally deciding to remove her underwear and tossing them across the room. He dropped back down, settling her legs on his shoulders. “I would suggest you brace yourself, sweet girl.”

“Did you seriously just say that?” She lifted her head off the mattress, trying to catch his eye. He looked up, winked, and then did something with his tongue that made her squeak. Loudly. “Nevermind. I get it. Do that again.”

Loki’s tongue swirled over her once more, and her fingers tightened in his hair as her body clamped down around his fingers. 

“Jesus, Jesus... _Jesus_. I’m so close. Please don’t stop again. I might actually die if you do.”

She heard a low sound of mirth as his tongue circled her again, and then he closed his lips around her and sucked. Her hips rose up, back arching wildly as the delicious tension inside started to unspool through her body. It went on and on, held captive by Loki’s talented tongue and fingers. Finally he gentled his mouth, giving her a final, slow lick before raising his head up to look at her. 

“Have I sufficiently quelled your frustration?” he asked, lips curling up mischievously.

“I’ll tell you when I’m able to talk again,” Darcy replied. She released her hold on his head and dropped her limp arms onto the bed beside her. 

“Do not get too comfortable, Mortal. I’m far from done with you.”

Loki prowled up her body, settling himself between her thighs with his weight supported on his arms. She could feel the tip of his cock nudging along her sensitized skin.

“Do we need something? For contraceptive purposes I mean,” she clarified. “I’m on the pill, but have no idea if that works with demi-gods or whatever you are.”

“You do not wish to bear my children? I am wounded, Mortal.”

His tone was so hurt that her eyes snapped open, searching for his face. The expression she saw there made her lie back with a sigh of relief.

“Oh my God, asshole. Don’t do that to me. I thought you were serious.”

“I have no plans for children at the moment, Darcy. And to answer your question, if your pills were not sufficient, my magic would be. You are safe in my bed.”

There was something about the way Loki worded it that gave her warm fuzzies. ‘Safe in his bed’, sounded really good to her. Almost too good. Better than she wanted to admit, in fact.

“So… If I’m safe and everything, what are you waiting for?” She wound her arms around his neck, pulling his face down to hers.

“Your impatience knows no bounds,” he mused, lips brushing hers with every word.

He was brushing her somewhere else too. She shifted her hips, bringing them into alignment. “Come on, God of Mischief. I dare you.”

Either Loki wasn’t about to let her get away with that comment, or he had reached the end of his restraint as well, but he canted his own hips forward thrusting a few inches into her welcoming heat. He groaned, muscles tensing in his back as he gave her a chance to adjust.

Then he began to rock, pulling back slightly before pushing in further each time. She could feel herself growing even wetter with each stroke, and it wasn’t long before her body was rocking up to meet his. He was thicker than she’d imagined, hard and hot inside her body. Darcy moaned as he fully sheathed himself at last. 

“Do I please you?” Loki teased, long frame moving against hers.

“Understatement,” she replied. “And you know that already. Oh my God, that feels so good. That angle. Let me just…” She put both palms flat on the headboard, giving herself leverage to lift her hips.

Loki made a sound of approval. He cupped the back of her head in one of his hands, and his mouth descended on hers in a greedy kiss. She responded enthusiastically, parting her lips for him and sucking his tongue when it slipped into her mouth. His chest rumbled against hers, and he nipped playfully at her bottom lip, tugging it with his teeth just before he pulled away. She pulled him back, mouth seeking out his for more. 

It suddenly occurred to Darcy that technically their first kiss had come _after_ they were already having sex. Surprisingly, that didn’t even seem that strange to her. With anyone else it might have been, but with Loki? It just felt right. So did the fact that she was still half-dressed. Something that was rapidly becoming a turn-on for her as his mouth traveled down her neck and across the swells of her breasts visible where her shirt was unbuttoned. Loki’s hand squeezed down between them, questing fingers coming to rest over her clit. He rubbed one over it in a tight circle, and she jerked.

“I don’t think…” Darcy began.

“Too much?” he asked, and she nodded.

The fingers moved again, circling more gently this time, avoiding direct contact in favor of settling just above where she was most sensitive. She relaxed into the softer touch, moving back into rhythm with him. After a few minutes, the sensation of him moving inside her coupled with what his hand was doing on the outside started building the tension up for her again. Darcy found her breath growing short, and her body arching into his more and more. 

Loki seemed to be getting close too. His eyes were nearly all pupil, lips parted, and cheeks stained with the flush of exertion. She angled his face for another kiss, reveling in the sensory overload at his lips met hers desperately. 

He groaned loudly, hips falling out of step with hers. “Darcy…”

“I know,” she said. “Just a little more. I’m almost there.”

She slipped her own hand down to join his, both sets of fingers helping to chase her release. There was something about that, the way he moved to hold her open so she could touch herself that pushed Darcy right over the edge. For a beat everything went completely still, and then she was crying out, wrapping her legs around his waist to pull him deeper as her body went wild around him.

Loki rode it out with her, thrusts coming hard and fast. He pushed her legs further open with his hands, movements causing the bed to crash repeatedly into the wall behind them. Just when she was sure that they were going to end up in the next bedroom he gave a final thrust, burying himself inside her and moaning her name in a way that made her decide that she wanted to do this again. Often.

He was silent for a few moments, head bowed over hers as he caught his breath. Darcy trailed her hands up and down his back, coaxing him closer. Loki acquiesced, allowing some of his weight to rest on top of her while supporting the rest on his arms. 

She sighed happily. A sated, contented feeling stealing over her and making her drowsy. “Thank you for that. I think you saved my birthday.”

His chest rumbled against hers as he laughed. “My pleasure, Ms. Lewis.”

“Darcy,” she corrected, poking him in the ribs. “Unless you want me to refer to you as Your Highness.” His head popped up immediately, eyes alight with mischief. Before he could open his mouth, she said, “Nevermind. Don’t answer that.”

Loki smiled. “You learn quickly.”

“So, what now? I’m not exactly sure what the protocol is for whatever just happened.”

He hummed quietly, tracing his fingers along her side, making her shiver. “I believe it is your birthday until midnight, and as you seem completely incapable of managing to keep yourself out of trouble today, I suggest you stay with me.”

She swallowed hard as the implications of that set in. “Okay.”

“And after that…” Loki shrugged. “I suppose that is up to you.”

“Up to me?” Darcy’s heartbeat picked up. 

“We could go back to what we were before...or not. I will leave that decision up to you. Personally I prefer the second option. It would certainly make our late night television viewing more interesting.”

“I um…” She cleared her throat. “I’m down with ‘or not’ actually.”

“Well then, Darcy, I believe you have your answer. Now,” Loki said, starting to undo the buttons on her shirt, “as we have gotten that sorted, I had intended to continue making this birthday memorable.”

“Happy birthday to me,” she declared as his lips followed his fingers.

“Indeed, Darcy Lewis, happy birthday to you.”


End file.
